Wahh- wahh- wahh…
The day started out good enough. The head boss had just decided to put together a team for new Oscar Meyer "carb-free, control that butt!" as campaign. Ken Rollins, had for some unknown reason, decided that Rob Tate and I would be the new team leaders of the ad campaign. For us this meant a hefty bonus and more vacation time- it also meant longer hours of staring off into space as Rollins droned of on yet another one of his tantrums. The tirades always came complete with that notorious little stream of spit seemed to emanate from between his fat lips. I always wondered how a man could talk for so long without bothering to swallow the heinous miniature colleague of his. Charming.
So back to my story- as I was saying, the new campaign was to promote a new chemically altered division of processed meat. On heralded, by the geeks in the bleach sterile labs, that could "guarantee a loss of one pound per wiener." One pound per weenie… seemed like a good enough gimmick and had already been stamped by the FDA's approval. Those "in the business" knew that the latest contribution to America's health shrine was one molecule away from synthetic plastic. It might as well have been a plastic picnic bench!
As a result of this new project, Rob and I had exactly twenty four hours to put together a presentation for Oscar Meyer's latest creation. The good news: it seemed almost impossible to screw up this idea of a new pound-dropping hot dog weenie. The bad news: it was completely possible for me to screw up this presentation for the pound-dropping hot dog weenie.
As soon as the offices on the 15th floor of Hampton's Communications Inc. began to thin out, Ron and I locked ourselves in to office marked "Harold Martin." The cheap glue had worn thin and now the nameplate bung precariously off to the left. M-m-m-h-h, I could smell the new cash already.
