SMARTEST
Smartest (L to R): Gerald Shaffer and Darlene Catchpenny
Gerald Shaffer
The wisdom of Gerald is undoubtedly vast
Even while some Savages puzzle over how many sides a triangle has.
With acumen ready and pen ever poised
Gerald is always the smartest of boys.
Darlene Catchpenny
Darlene will be a great teacher, and how!
But it sometimes seems she’s a teacher right now.
She parses our errors and helps us along
All the while singing a teacherly song.
Gerald Shaffer is our austere valedictorian. A dedicated bird watcher and staunch naturalist, Gerald is the deep thinker of the class. ASHS classes wouldn’t be the same without him arguing with all the teachers! His massive brain is also powered by a diet of vegetables and sprouts—he’s our school’s only vegetarian. Gerald heads the National Honor Society, the Debating Society, and was also the president of the Spanish club until it got disbanded this year.
A popular saying at ASHS is that you can’t catch Darlene Catchpenny away from her textbooks. A constant companion and friend to teachers everywhere, Darlene even got a key to the teacher’s lounge her senior year. She was winner of the Citizenship Award for her essay on the Liberty Bell and works part-time restocking books at the school library. Next year she plans to attend a local university to get a degree in Special Education.