Text I

So Trapping

There are codes that still bear out,

Being brave when terrified.

When men feel like they should have been brave

And/or strong and aren’t

Especially liberal men are surprised,

It bothers them that they weren’t.

They are ambushed by these concepts.

Maybe they’re concepts,

Maybe they’re urges.

Working out those roles,

Me supposed to be the man,

Not sensitive,

Doesn’t show her feelings.

She masculinized me.

At points I really really liked that.

At points like she made me feel like, “This is my man.”

I’m not a man.

I don’t want a straight relationship.

Sometimes sex with women,

Demands something I don’t wanna give.

I get this, “Be more aggressive,

I want you to hit me,

I want you to not be gentle with me,

I want you to throw me around,

I want you to pull my hair.”

I don’t want to do any of those things.

It’s not part of that intimacy,

It’s not what works for me,

It’s not what I feel natural doing.

It’s very much a show.